Suit and Tie

Men, men, men....I do not know where to begin, but what has happened to you all? I am beyond confused about this new epidemic of completely beautiful men thinking that the opposite sex is attracted to their new woodsman look. When we said we like Duck Dynasty that was to say that we think it is funny and that we enjoy watching the show with you, not that we want to take those men home and make babies with them.

Funny does not always mean sexy, unless we are talking about Ryan Reynolds of course.

Really what this makes me think of is the scene in Clueless when Cher is talking about not understanding the male population of her generations ensemble selection. I believe she says, "So okay, I don't want to be a traitor to my generation and all but I don't get how guys dress today. I mean, come on, it looks like they just fell out of bed and put on some baggy pants and take their greasy hair - ew - and cover it up with a backwards cap and like, we're expected to swoon? I don't think so."

Okay, well mountain men of my generation I can assure you that when the women of this generation see your "no shave November" look going into the months of March (because it has literally been that long since you cut your hair or shaved your face) we are not thinking, "mmmhmm, let me get me some of that". Instead you reminding us of Burt Reynolds character from the end of the movie Without a Paddle makes us think, well of just that...Burt Reynolds's character from Without a Paddle. He was funny, he was crazy, but sexy...he was not.

I will be perfectly honest here, I detest long hair on guys and I'm not much of a fan for facial hair, unless it is maintained, so I know my opinion may seem biased. If you are reading this and think, well this is just her opinion and obviously not what she is attracted to, then yes you would be somewhat right. I will not argue, this is my opinion that is fact, but really and truly the reason I, as well as several other women I have spoken with feel the way that we do about this new look that so many men are currently sporting is because it makes them look unkempt.

I do not think that physical appearance is the most important thing in the world. I do believe that what is on the inside is more important. In fact I know many people who I would not have considered hot at first glance, but now that I know them I think they are extremely attractive. With that being said, I am not the most shallow person in the world, but I do think it is imperative that we take care of ourselves.

When I see a man who looks like he needs to cut his hair and shave his face I immediately think he needs to bathe. Dirty is not sexy. Guys you may be squeaky clean, but in my head I'm thinking your not so fresh and so clean clean. This new trend suggests to me that you look this way because you don't care. Those who don't care are lazy. Lazy is not an adjective that people want associated with themselves. Looking messy tells me that you do not care about yourself and are probably lacking in hygiene. Hygiene is a must!

When I see a man who looks like he doesn't care about himself it is a tell tell sign to me that he will not care about anyone else either and why would I want to be with a man like that? Why would any woman want to be with a man that could never care for her? If you don't care enough to care about yourself, you obviously will never care about me. No woman that I know of would want these qualities in a man.

I miss the olden days when people were classy and had personal pride in themselves. They woke up in the mornings and got DRESSED. Men and women. They did not just roll out and go because that simply would not be acceptable. The suit is a classic and one that few men these days seem utilize.

Suits are like a magic weapon that men forget about. Obviously there is more to it than just throwing on the suit, but it's a big step. Suits are sexy, they make men look sexy, they evoke a sense of power that is indescribable. If a man wears a suit and has shaved his face, fixed his hair and look like he actually gave a shit before he walked out of his house then his sex appeal multiplies immensely.

The fact is men, like it or not, a classic is a classic for a reason. The suit is the equivalent to our "little black dress". It just works! Men are much more visual creatures than women, this is why statistically a man is more likely to have a porn addiction than a woman. So men think of it this way... a well tailored suit is to women what lingerie is to men. Men think about how much it turns you on to see us in sexy lingerie...don't you want to turn us on the same way?

These are merely some suggestions to the burley men of my generation. Consider all that I have said and take it to heart. If a suit is not your thing then just do this and I promise it will dramatically increase your sex appeal...are you ready for the secret...are you...are you hanging at the edge of your seat...here it goes...I'll tell you...this is all you have to do...cut your hair and shave your face. Let us see those beautiful features that God gave you. If I have to search for your lips under all that hair that is on your face I am not going to want to kiss them (no matter how good of a kisser you are). That's it. The big secret is out, now if you want to turn an entire 180 then I suggest you suit up!

Here is some pictoral proof. Enjoy!

 

Love Always,

 

Cassandra B.

"The Other C.B."

Always On My Mind

Papa Gene with an OU football...no surprise there :)

On January 30, 2013 the best man I know passed away. He was kind, thoughtful, funny and completely selfless. He had the best heart known to man and loved more than any other person I have ever met. The person to whom I am referring is my grandpa. Papa Gene had the biggest heart, so it is almost ironic to me that his heart is what caused him to no longer be with us. In all honesty I truly believed he had a whole lot of years left in him, but I suppose God knows better than I. I say this so that those of you out there who have grandparents that you love, but you do not spend as much time with as you should, do not take them for granted. When you decide that you want to go spend time with them, they may not be around.

I wrote my Papa Gene’s obituary for the funeral home’s Web site and used it (with a witty twist that I know he would have appreciated) for the funeral program, so that is not what I desire to do with this post. Instead I would prefer to spend this time to tell you all some of the things that I wish had have been said during his service. I want to give you all some insight into who it was that my Papa Gene was and why he was so important to me. This is more or less a tribute to him and maybe a great way for me to grieve. Whatever the reason, be it therapeutic or otherwise, you should continue to read this.

Growing up I thought I was the luckiest girl in the world because I had a grandpa who was funny. Not just funny to me, but apparently funny to all. He was random and would just say things completely out of the blue, such as, “Oh God, why did you make me so sexy”. He loved sports and took me to my very first OU women’s basketball game when I was around 6 years-old. He also loved food. That man could tell you about all of the best places to eat, what was good there and how much it cost. He seriously could talk to you about food and/or sports all day. So basically as long as your home carried ESPN and the Food Network you were good to go in his book.

Papa Gene also loved to watch old TV shows and movies. I would come home and he would be watching the Gene Autry show and laughing his adorable little laugh and then talking about how ridiculous one of the characters on the show was. He was a huge Elvis fan (was born on the exact same day even). I tried to convince my little brother Josh that our grandpa was Elvis and that he decided he no longer wanted to live that life so he chose to fake his death and have a life of normalcy. This was actually not a hard story for one to believe because I had “facts” to back my case. Papa Gene had side burns, an old Cadillac and was really excited about the brand new leather jacket that he had recently gotten. I don’t know if Josh really believed me or not, but I bet there was at least a few moments of pondering on his side.

My Papa was not just an old school kind of man; he was pretty down with the times too. My senior year of high school I lived at my grandparents’ house and would watch “Desperate Housewives”, not for the amazing plot line and epic character development (hahaha), but simply because he thought Eva Longoria was hot. He also liked watching “Two in a Half Men” even though my Grandma Dorma found it highly inappropriate. Poppy enjoyed old Brat Pack movies because he thought that Mollie Ringwald was adorable and he would always watch romantic comedies with me, which he always referred to as, “little teeny bopper movies”.

The best dates I have ever had in my life were with my Papa Gene. We use to go to the dollar movie, just he and I (the real theater every once in a while….side note to this…the theater closest to my grandparents’ home is called Starworld 20 Dickinson Theatre’s, in my family we simply refer to it as “The Dick”, if this is any indication for you about how serious we all are…hahaha!). We would always go see some silly little comedy and he would complain about how stupid the movie was when we would get home, but the whole time we were at the movie he would laugh and laugh. We almost always went out to eat before or after and more often than not would stop at Braum’s (Bram’s, according to Poppy) for ice cream that I was not supposed to tell Grandma Dorma about…LOL.

My Papa Gene was my date to my senior Football formal and escorted me senior night out on the football field. I was an athletic trainer in high school and no matter how hot or cold, so long as it was a home game Poppy was always there. I also did a whole lot of plays and pageants in high school, which he was not as good about attending, but he would always let me perform my competitive pieces for him before I would go to a drama contest. He was always good to ask me not just about myself, but about those who mattered to me to, because you know when you’re a “teeny bopper” your friends are the most important things to you in the world. He would even ask me about my pets because he knew they were important to me too!

When Papa got sick and went to the hospital he never complained. In fact he would always talk about how he was fine. He was ready to go home and he wanted to eat food that was not “crappy”. I went up there to see him a lot, but wish I would have gone more. We watched a lot of news and a WHOLE lot of Sportscenter. He talked to me about my Thunder team, even though he could have cared less because the basketball games on that he cared to discuss was the OU women’s team, which we talked about too. When it was just he and I at the hospital we would watch Charlie Sheen’s new show because it was, “kind of naughty”.  Truly this is where my grandpa was the best. One on one’s.

The day I received the phone call that he had not made it through the night was a hard one, for I knew my life would never ever be the same. There would now always be something missing. Not everyone knows this, but losing my Papa Gene was as much like losing a parent as some may experience. My biological father has chosen to be fairly absent in the last few years and pops in and out when it is convenient for him, but my Poppy , he on the other hand has been a consistent. He was not always great about verbalizing how it was that he felt (because in all honesty, he probably could not have gotten a word in edge-wise), but I don’t doubt at all that he loved me.

Like many girly girls, growing up I have thought about my wedding, but probably not to the extent that some have. I have no idea who the groom will be (crossing my fingers for Zac Efron), what kind of dress I’ll wear, what the color scheme will be etc… however, the one thing that I have always wanted is for my Papa Gene to be the person to officiate the ceremony. See my Papa Gene was a retired pastor, so he would not even have to be ordained online…he was legitimately legit…lol. Now I know this is something that will never happen for me and that makes me super sad because he will be missing on that day.

I should have made a point to go see him more since I have moved back closer to him, but I did not. As mentioned before, Papa Gene had a bit of a sweet tooth and Village Inn has free pie on Wednesdays. I had talked about taking him to get a free piece of pie and he said he would go. We planned it a few times and had to reschedule because of me. We never went and got that pie. It seems stupid, but brings me to tears whenever I think about it. It was not about the pie; it was about the time we would have spent together. I say this so that any of you reading this will think about these things and go get that piece of pie with your person before they are not around to have pie with.

Love Always,

Cassandra B.

"The Other C.B."