I'll be there for you

So I was advised that this week was "Bestie Week", now I'm not going to research this and find out if that is true or not, but in the interest of transparency I thought I would go ahead and let you know. I also do not feel that a specific week needs to be set aside that one needs to realize and recognize that their "person" is important to them. So with that being said, I believe we should recognize every day as bestie day!

Now that I have gotten that out of the way, I want to talk about friendships today and why each one of them is so imperative to our existence. I want to talk about why it is necessary to have people in our lives and why being a "best friend whore" is important (yes Amanda...that one is for you). So lets get to it!

Not every person is brought into your life for a reason, but every person you choose to remain in it has a purpose. This is because these people bring something out in you or fill some kind of void, thus making them a requirement in your life.

One of the biggest mistakes I think people make when talking about their friends is assigning one of them as their "best friend" and the rest are just "friends", making them sound like they are less important and they aren't...no friend would make another friend feel that way. Look at "Sex and the City", who would you say was Carrie's BFF? You can't because she has three! See it's alright to have more than one because people need people!

This year I took a new job, away from all my peeps and the ones that were closer (in proximity), weren't super close and I knew that realistically I would never see them because they are living their own lives and let me tell you what, I felt super lonely. I would spend a majority of my days (when not at work) alone in my apartment (I shouldn't say alone...I had my dog Bentley), but I was lacking human interaction. It was depressing and not a way that one should live their life. I made friends, and from time to time I would get to see my old friends. The phone became my most important accessory...I would talk and text ALL THE TIME. Not that I didn't do that before, but the phone became my lifeline. The fact is people need people because without them...I was a big hot mess in a very dark and twisty kind of place. No bueno!

This is where I will explain why being a "best friend whore" is important. You have to have more than one friend...you should have many full of great quality, not many for the purpose of having great quantity. There are people we meet that it feels like we have known our entire lives, others who immediately you just click with because they get you or think just like you. Some friends are your polar opposite and expose you to things you never would do on your own, therefore making you a more well rounded person. There are friends you go to when you are in desperate need for a good time and others you go to when you are in desperate need of a good cry. Some friends you can go months without speaking to and pick right back up where you left off like no time has passed at all. Some friends you have to talk to every day or it just feels off. Some friends are your girls, some are your guys, some are your sisters or brothers, aunts or mom.

I like to categorize mine with different BFF names. If you are given a nickname by me, that automatically means that I consider you one of my besties. So you are either your nickname (Code for best friend), my person, my bestie, my bff, my sister, my bestie guy friend, my bestie girl friend, my Mommy, my girl, my guy, Handsome, Mixty, Beck, Palin, Terrence, Sis, Sib, Biggy, Trystle, niece, Little Linda, Fry Rye, Little one, Boo Boo, Boo Boo Panda Bear, Kare Bear, Katerax, Joshy, kiddo, pisshole, koala bear, my motherf'ing scientist, c-lowe, my jew, cuz, Jay-Z, honey, honey bunches, rooms, rommie, etc... If your name is shortened and I call you by your full name that's a good sign that you are one of my besties, If I've shortened your name and call you by your first initial, if I have ever been in your wedding party (or if you are planning on me being...yeah I'm working on my 27 Dresses status). Really if I call you by any term of endearment really then you are probably on my VIP BFF list.  I am sure I have left people off, but I hope that if you are one of my BFF's then you know it already.

So regardless of whether or not it is in fact Bestie Week...call, text, or remind the people that you love that you can't imagine a world without them. Celebrate Bestie week...this week and every other one to follow!

Love Always,

Cassandra B.

“The Other C.B.”

Complicated

Hello all! It has been some time since my last post and allow me to truly preface that it was out of my realm of thought for how much my life could truly change in only a matter of hours. My absence from textual conversation was not for lack of wanting to write, but instead lack of what to write. No...not the infamous writers block, but instead I have been faced with a plethora of emotions that I have no idea how to deal with.

Since my last post a million things have changed. I started a new job, not the position of my dreams, but I am very happy there and everyone is sincerely and legitimately kind. I think it is somewhere I could truly be happy working at for a very long time, but like my previous employment situations it is not a job that requires any of the skills that I worked so hard to master...literally with a degree. However, if I could find a way to use these skills I have aquired to navigate my way to a higher position. That office is one in which I would be happy to remain employed.

The loss of many people in my life, whether it be by one's choice or by God is something that has truly impacted me and my entire thought process about EVERYTHING! My Mom died on March 5 this year and that incident has left a giant hole not only in my heart, but my life as well. Losing Mom, my best friend, the one person who was always on my side is not something that I thought I would have to deal with as a mere 26 year old. It sounds rediculous, but it's the way I feel. I may be an "adult", but I still need my Mommy. I may be an "adult", but I feel as if I am orphaned. I have sat down a million times since her passing to write about her and there simply are not enough words to express how much she meant to me.

I have tried to think about significant events of my life to share, because I thoroughly LOVE talking about Mom and in no way do I want to forget her or anybody else for that matter, but it's really hard. She is a part of almost every single significant event that has occured in my life. March 5 was one day out of 26 years. Most of which were amazing because I was blessed with the most wonderful mother in the entire world.

The truth of the matter is I am still me, but my life is now split into two different periods. Life with Mom and life after. I know who I was, but now I'm not entirely sure who I am. Where does one go from here? When I am ready to write about Mom and everything it will not be able to be one post, but instead a series of them. One would be a disgrace and I know that for a blog writing an epic novel is not something that anyone would venture to read. The point of posting about Mom is so that I can share her life with other's, so it is essential that their is a desire from those of you out there to want to hear about it. So standby...there is more to come about Mom, known to most as Paula.

As previously mentioned a couple of paragraphs before I have suffered the loss of many people. Mom and Poppy due to death. The other's because for one reason or another they no longer want to include me in their life. One is a boy who has been the topic of a post, the other's are family members. One of those members no longer feels that it is necissary to have any kind of contact with me because, "we have nothing in common" and the other has no choice because she is a child and is limited in her options. I need it to be known that I miss and love each and everyone of these people who are now absent from my life.

This post is not to be depressing, but instead to explain that things are different. In closing I would like to say that I have a TON of things that I would love to write about and one day when I can get my 500 million thoughts in order I will start to share them. Some things are funny, some sad, some analytical and some are just straight up girly. Regardless, they are my thoughts and they are little pieces of information that will shine some insight into who I am. Until then...take care of yourselves, go see your mom because you never know when the last time will be, love and cherish the relationships that you do have with all of those you have selected to be in your life. Remember that families are a blessing and that even if we do not always agree that does not in any way mean that we do not care. Be sweet to eachother! Until then...stay tuned!

Love Always,

Cassandra B.

"The Other C.B."